Help Our Company Fund Research for a Vaccine to Eradicate Remote Work

Together, and to be clear I mean physically together, we can beat this scourge.

Photo by Arlington Research on Unsplash

What makes you feel good about your job? For me it’s walking into the office and seeing all the smiling faces of my work family. I am their fearless general. Because all families are also a military.

But there is a disease threatening that dream. A disease we must join together to fight.

That disease is the concept that work can be completed somewhere other than under my beatific gaze. Together we can kick its ass!

Work Smarter, Harder, And Where I Can See You

I didn’t go to business school to learn management and not manage people. I didn’t then apply to opportunity after opportunity just because I liked flying around the country on my family’s jet. And I didn’t accept this position through family connections simply because I couldn’t hack it anywhere else. No.

I did all those things to fulfill my dream of managing people, which occurred to me through “Business” being the default course of study for moneyed people shoveled into college without benefit of aspirations.

But that dream is wasted if the people I manage are not where I can see them, be close to them, and then deny any inappropriate overtones persuant to being close to them.

That’s Why We Need to Fight This Disease

Remote work is a scourge that is destroying water cooler conversations that are critical to a cohesive corporate effort. And before you bring it up, no, the water cooler’s “cooling” function is still having some challenges. And yes, it’s the same challenges it had before spring 2020. But that should have no effect on the conversation around it so let’s just not get bogged down.

I believe that MRNA style vaccines coupled with mood elevation drugs and possiby some spicy electric therapy can convert even the most strident advocates for remote work into office family-army champions.

That might mean being away from your teenagers a little more than you have been over the gross years of the pandemic. But we’re working on answers for that too by relaxing regulations that unfairly keep kids out of the work force.

Why shouldn’t they get to work too? A lot of them can lift things. Any doctor will agree there’s no better time to enjoy the value of your body than before your joints give out.

Annoyed your kids look at their phone too much? We have answers for that too. As the saying out in the warehouse goes, “There ain’t no Tiktok on the loading dock!”

Look, Family. Listen, Family. At The End of the Day. We are a Family.

Reach deep into your pockets to help fight this. We need to be together. Sharing the same space. Working toward one goal: Family.

My door, as always, is open. If you’d like to leave your hot desk to come into my office and bend my ear, you’re welcome any time I want you to.

And, in the end, isn’t that what really matters? Family?