I Just Flipped From MAGA to Democrat Because I'm Writing my Tinder Profile

I'm above all this left-right nonsense by being 100% right.

Photo by Austin Distel on Unsplash

What’s up, everyone? It’s me, Clayden. I like to work hard, play hard, and read up on LGB32 stuff. When it comes to women’s issues I’m totally in favor. My voting record? That’s private ya silly goose!

I’m into outdoor surroundings like knives, guns, and Jeeps. I can quote weirdly deeply from certain philosophical texts. Huge fan of Marlin Lunar King.

I like my streaming TV shows ad-free and emotion-free. My favorite podcasts are just asking questions. I can’t wait to find out what Soros and Pelosi do next.

I hope we can get together and get to know each other’s unprotected sex. And who knows? If things work out, maybe it could lead to more red flags!